Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(406): View more from Montana

someone owes me an orgasm

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(406): someone owes me an orgasm http://tfl.nu/u7wj

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(651): View more from Minnesota

You were running around the house with a purple crayon asking people to call you harold..

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(651): You were running around the house with a purple crayon asking people to call you harold.. http://tfl.nu/rd4a

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(253): View more from Washington

is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?

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(253): is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing? http://tfl.nu/rrvx

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(708): View more from Illinois

she was throwing up and singing "I HAD a feeling that tonight was going to be a good good night." And yeah she was still in her dress.

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(708): she was throwing up and singing "I HAD a feeling that tonight was going to be a good good night." And yeah she was still in her dress. http://tfl.nu/x8tu

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(647): View more from Ontario

It was great. Even bought me breakfast in the AM

(416): View more from Toronto

From?

(647): View more from Ontario

Well, he didn't exactly take me out, but left a $20 on the table...

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(647): It was great. Even bought me breakfast in the AM (416): From? (647): Well, he didn't exactly take me out, but left a $20 on the table... http://tfl.nu/hv77

Replies (16) Good night (2303) Bad night (5295)
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(310): View more from California

I was surprised he admitted he couldnt keep up. We both knew but usually they dont come out and say it

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(310): I was surprised he admitted he couldnt keep up. We both knew but usually they dont come out and say it http://tfl.nu/jugc

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(419): View more from Ohio

All his texts have the signature of a date with a smile. I asked him what it means. IT'S THE DAY HE QUIT DOING DRUGS

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(419): All his texts have the signature of a date with a smile. I asked him what it means. IT'S THE DAY HE QUIT DOING DRUGS http://tfl.nu/2lvs

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(414): View more from Wisconsin

Midnight run for medical supplies ended several hours later with a lapdance to the Braveheart soundtrack.

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(414): Midnight run for medical supplies ended several hours later with a lapdance to the Braveheart soundtrack. http://tfl.nu/nm91

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(801): View more from Utah

I found your pet lobster in the bathroom this morning. I went to return it to you but it escaped.

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(801): I found your pet lobster in the bathroom this morning. I went to return it to you but it escaped. http://tfl.nu/dgi2

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(312): View more from Illinois

Smoked a Vape in the library status: completed

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(312): Smoked a Vape in the library status: completed http://tfl.nu/to9s

Replies (4) Good night (1224) Bad night (485) Order T-Shirt
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(406): View more from Montana

You said your legs stopped working and then pulled yourself around the floor with your hands.

(1-406): View more from Montana

That explains the wood chips stuck in my nipples.

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(406): You said your legs stopped working and then pulled yourself around the floor with your hands. (1-406): That explains the wood chips stuck in my nipples. http://tfl.nu/g6g8

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(646): View more from New York

Ive only seen a dude masterbate on a train twice, once on the Jtrain and once on the Ftrain... trust me you never wanna see where the subway turns around.

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(646): Ive only seen a dude masterbate on a train twice, once on the Jtrain and once on the Ftrain... trust me you never wanna see where the subway turns around. http://tfl.nu/mt6p

Replies (7) Good night (457) Bad night (1186)
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(719): View more from Colorado

I'm dealing with this like an adult, cupcakes and beer.

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(719): I'm dealing with this like an adult, cupcakes and beer. http://tfl.nu/9z00

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(978): View more from Massachusetts

Im laying on the couch wishing someone was here to pour wine in my mouth. I need an alcohol IV

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(978): Im laying on the couch wishing someone was here to pour wine in my mouth. I need an alcohol IV http://tfl.nu/diup

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(310): View more from California

If you got tons of KY ads on HuluPlus, it's because I hit "relevant" every time.

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(310): If you got tons of KY ads on HuluPlus, it's because I hit "relevant" every time. http://tfl.nu/wm4g

Replies (1) Good night (865) Bad night (207) Order T-Shirt

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