like if someone fucked a dictionary but instead of having a penis, it was just one of those leap frog educational toys
I hope to god you are high
Oh. He liked you.
Then you said "Are you asian?, I didn't know there was Asians in Colorado."
Its not small because its small, Its small because it was cold outside
my mom just asked me about sexting and if I have ever sent a naked picture to anyone. i fucking hate fox news.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have some memory of taking a dump in a guitar case.
It was a new level of awkwardness and terror. The high schoolers you fuck in the summer should never introduce themselves to your mom and godmother
Dont even bother asking why she was dancing with him on top of a door, let alone how the door ended up being used as a table.
I mean turning down birthday sex is never the answer
I am listening to lecture and I can hear us in the background talking about anal beads.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think his roommates are using word magnets to tell me that they can hear us. His fridge currently says, "Chris ate out naughty girl."
I just did the walk of shame..with a blanket and a cup that says i will out drink all you bitches. This was not how i pictured 25.
I got to see a stripper that did magic last night. It was glorious.
First thing I find in the car I just pick up from my grandpa? A discount card for the strip club down the road from his apartment. The force is still strong.
I love you even if you are fucked up. If you fall, i'll just get on top of you.
So you can now add nose to my list of places that cum has gone that it shouldn't...
Randomize