dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
please take me off your list of people to text when you don't want to drink by yourself.
We've reached that awkward stage of the relationship where he's in love with me when he's drunk, but sober him is still afraid of commitment.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nothing says I have a hang over like telling your boss to "eat your shit"
He must be back home now. He moved his box of beer from her porch to ours.
Stop making excuses. You can be here in 5 and cumming in 10
I'm sitting at work trying to dust glitter off my pants. I can't hang out with her anymore.
Oh my fucking god you idiot bitch just get here forget about the vodka the fucking cops are looking for you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I forgive you, at least you vote. I found out my fuck buddy isn't even registered. I won't fuck a non respectable citizen.
There is no sno cone on earth better than alone naked time. Side note: text when you all are headed home.
I made out with about ten people last night. And four of them were just on the way to my car from the bar. And one was my roommate.
WELL THEN WHAT DAY IS IT?!?! This whole having to choose between ruining my future and ruining my liver is totally killing my vibe
never let me tell the bartender to cut me off, i basically told on myself
Took my nervous poop earlier then expected it's gonna be a good day
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