I figured girls wouldn't be down to sleep w/ a guy who plugged a pregnant chick
I just febrezed the jizz on my pants and wore them again, gross or eco-friendly?
Eco-friendly.
My poo smells like dog food. That's how I know it was a good night.
He told me about his girlfriends trust issues during our post sex spooning
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I met him yesterday and now he's wanting to hold hands and kiss in public. i hate this
it was like a congratulatory penis slap
Katelyn drunkenly ripped the soap dispenser off the wall so we decided to call it quits
DO IT, or I'll send you pictures of my hickey to remind you of your loneliness
Oh and no more ball pics to my family. Got in a little trouble over that. They have no sense of humor.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
sex on the stairs. not our finest idea.
If there was a build-a-penis, I would build that penis.
Best ethics paper a stoner could write. I called my professor Dr. Superfly Arandia. And I'm pretty sure I used "respect the hustle" somewhere in there too.
You must take up my position now. You must pass out in awkward places as I taught you... Sears a hotel elevator and Burger King bathroom. You potential for greater young grasshopper.
I never saw such an emotional argument over yellow vs. spicy mustard.
that was the most beautifully crafted sentence ive ever read that involved the phrase "genitals or whatever"
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