btw ... thanks for not giving me up as the craigslist killer
i owe you one
thanks for snagging those panties for me
Miracle whip is the devil's jizz.
I put so much effort into my vagina today. If i don't get laid tonight I'm gonna be pissed.
Jon thought he was that blonde chick from Three's Company when he was shrooming
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
gpnpr hd vmdd nm the ggrl whm was mn my lar
I need you to use more vowels.
MISSING: One left eyebrow. Reward if returned.
A DRUNK EMT IS BETTER THAN NO EMT!!!
He just kept screaming "I have democratic immunity" as the cops dragged him into the car.
I just had to explain to my 62 year old advisor what "tea-bagging" was in the middle of her lecture. I smell extra credit. And maybe a demonstration.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I may or may not be wearing slippers and a TMNT hat. This thing better not have a dress code.
Yeah. Well last night I sold my shoes to a man who I'm pretty sure has a weird foot fetish for $150 cash.
When are you going to accept the fact he is gay?
Come on... He's just practicing.
Ok. That's acceptable.
Is "head down ass up" an appropriate way to say good morning?
Last night was a whirlwind of vodka - induced emotion
we finally found him at 2 am. he was 3 miles from the house and tried running into the lake when he saw us pull up. i don't think he'll be taking ecstacy again any time soon.
Randomize