we're at the bar and some girl dropped a bottle of burnettes strawberry vodka out of her purse and it broke.
i mean, if that's not class, then i don't know what is
my mother and i just seriously had a convorsation about why you cant Google "Refurbished Dildos"
Farmville is her only friend.
He literally didn't stop until I lost count of how many times he made me orgasm. It took three hours.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Suuuuuuper drunk and just sang fuck her gently to the chiminea. I'm in bad shape.
He met a random girl on the bus home and decided to go to Spain with her. The blackout decisions are becoming internationally epic. He has work in the morning.
That was a $3000 rug we rolled him down the hill in.
I think its pretty common. 1 out of every 4 people probably have a stripper's phone # in their phone.
Yelling back at the people on Jerry springer through the TV, and eventually punching it. Failure of a night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
On a scale from 1 to the worst weekend of my life, that was an 11. I can see again, though.
Hold on, I need to find something to wear that says "I don't contribute to your daughter's drug problem"
He went down on me for an hour and a half. He needs to get promoted more often.
The fact that I made out with a twenty one year old father is kind of worrying me now. Like. This is exactly what I wasn't supposed to do in life.
you better come over.. I need a witness to help prove the couch talks to me
The weirdest part of it all was wondering if I was going to take off his fanny pack or he was before we fucked
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