thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
It's a miracle Ok Typing texts toYou right now
I looooooove Saturdays!!!!!!!
I am absolutely hammered
Her vagina felt like a horse was eating an apple out of my hand..
I just puked in my fish tank. Helloooooo summer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we found you under the sink... we opened up the doors and you told us to go away because you were playing indian in the cupboard
I haven't gone out since the baby was born. If I don't get arrested, in a fight, or both I'm going to be super pissed.
You'd think somebody who rolls blunts like jesus himself could roll a god damn burrito
When you text me tomorrow to remind me to mail your parking pass, also remind me to make sure i did NOT pack my vibrator for this family vacation
Does Jim keep sending you pics of him in drag too???? If so, are you also slightly uncomfortable?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Naked snow angels was a very bad idea. My vag is now frozen shut.
Not going to lie: not even the fact I'm wearing men's cargo pants can hide the fact I have an awesome ass.
He fell asleep cradling my ass and every time I moved he adjusted his hand accordingly. I've found the one.
you made it your goal to puke in every planter around the union. you got most of them. im proud of you
We finally gave up searching because everything had started to look like flip flops
Painted a stripper an elf costume. Her coworkers liked it. Now in a room full of naked strippers.
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