Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
I think I ordered pizza when I got home. The email said the delivery time was noon today. So if that shit shows up I am the most amazing drunk on the planet.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he proposed by singing a showtune... he might as well have had a cock in his mouth at the time
I just had a Brazilian done for this guy. He's getting first-date sex whether he wants it or not.
I can't even go pee because I'm making sure he doesn't run off somewhere naked.
Fantastic. I'm pretty cold, tired, dirty, and hungry, but that comes with an adventurous weekend. Who needs a wallet or keys anyway? I could totally be homeless.
Tell me right now I did the right thing by not fucking my sick gf at 3 am with her family home... Tell me my balls hurt for noble reasons.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yes, he made a MIX CD for our booty call...
The best part about drinking boxed wine is you can blow up the bag and use it as a pillow
Thanks for the pic It's going to be lovely dealing with my boner while I'm in a meeting with your father.
My ex husband is now my side piece. #thisis30
I'm no doctor but I don't think balls are supposed to look like that.
If you binge watch Bill Nye Saves the World without me you can consider yourself single
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