I want to snug with you.
You want my snuggie?
i want you now
you need to stop dating girls with the same name as your mother...or stop drinking so much...I don't want to see this
Some man just said he would jack off to my hair color.
i think you shook his penis after he was done peeing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Um, I don't really remember much about the event... and then I woke up on the metro..
your boyfriend is drunk and yelling to the bar that he loves his cats
Sandwiches are there for you when porn isn't.
I'm writing my will in case I die this week, it'll be saved on my computer under: little 500 death scenario
If you don't get head tonight I will castrate you
Seriously. Castrate.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I finished masturbating now I'm eating french toast crunch. What is life, and what are friends.
Those thigh tattoos deserve the handsomest of grins between them. Dont settle.
So why are your hands bright blue and have you seen my roommate.
Both questions will answer each other.
Well, I could just slap my dick to my phone and see what it says
Hungover on St. Patrick's Day. I did this backwards.
I feel a blackout coming on
Plz don't have me burst into your house saying you're late for re airport to rescue you from a fat girl again
That was 2 times
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