so he just left - touched my cheek like he was gona kiss me and then gave me a fist bump?
I'm watching the red sox through my neighbors window from my bathroom. We're winning btw.
all i remember is that her bootyshorts said 'shameless' and that there was no turning back.
Best part of failing a semester of college: not having to buy books next semester. I can drink to that
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't know how I feel about the stuff we got from that guy. Me and Monty are driving through town listening to static at full blast...
Are you alive?
I googled "I don't want to vomit anymore," and "how to rip out your uvula," at 9 am this morning, but I'm still here. Uvula and all.
Sometimes crazy just comes naturally. I don't need booze to say that on occasion I feel the need to rip off my asshole and throw it against the fridge to see if it sticks.
Who knew you could get a drunk in public when jogging with your dog?
hes fine. but he did fall asleep while tebowing and started snoring
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So much for doing Irish car bombs in my grandpa's memory.... Asshole.
I mean, who doesn't have an ex involved with bath salts?
I'm going back to his house to watch wreck it Ralp.
Hey, Monsters Inc. got me laid. Disney man, who knew it leads to sex.
If muffins & morning blowjobs don't make him happy, frankly, I don't think anything will.
I wish there were more things in this world as wonderful as string cheese
Surriously
3 hour lecture of my biology teacher talking about isotopes and space shuttles. I'm way too high for this.
Randomize