My dog ate my bag of weed. Thats not the easiest call to the vet to make.
Two kids are drinking pounders in class. I think I'm hanging out with the wrong group of friends.
i've been fucking this guy since february and just found out he might be uncircumsized. currently google image searching to confirm.
I just experienced a full blown christian wedding. I am SO GLAD YOUR WEDDING WASNT THIS.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At best buy, little boy just crawled into my stall while i was taking a shit
I just had one of those moments where i was really sad that i'll never get to be asian.
i would think by now you'd realize that my penis does whatever the fuck it wants and i have no control over the situation
She threw up in the hot tub how's your night
I just got a call from the front desk apparently one of my feiends was dropped off by a handicap bus passed out in a wheel chair unlv is goig down
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Are you considering all the consequences of doing your boss or are you just rationalizing with your vagina?
Are you coming to class or was the dick pic this morning your way of saying not today?
Did you really get 12 corn dogs from the gas station last night?
I just watched will sing pure imagination from willy wonka and then blow a banana
we played his NES Classic. Turns out there is a warp zone to my vagina.
I went to the nurse and she literally told me I was too sexually active and wrote me a prescription for 7 days of pelvic rest...... Hahahhahaha
Randomize