Quick, to the slutcave!
I woke up this morning with a bag of pepperonis in my bed.... and my facebook status was "pepperonis"
My cleaning lady just walked in the kitchen and i had a hardcore boner. I dont know what awkward is anymore
He jacked off on my pillow when he found out I left. It was like coming home and finding that your dog, with separation anxiety, had pooped in your shoes. I think I'm flattered...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
Somehow "stranger danger" turned into making out with a 25 year old on burbon street.
Stumbled into class and into a desk. When I fell my bottle broke in my backpack. I had to leave there was vodka everywhere.
They evidently had to pull his penis out of me while we were passed out on the floor.
Posting happy birthday to my grandpa on Facebook.... Then realizing my profile pic is me dressed as a slutty cop when he used to be a police officer.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
how the hell were we supposed to out run the cops in a bus?
I'm gonna guess ur still high cus last night at like 3am my pillows were morphing into cats and I kept trying to pet them
Tackling and headbutting friends, running away and hiding from everyone, attempting to streak across campus, and then waking up with no sign of a hangover... happy 21 to me
His dick isn't even good enough to be this much of an asshole
Don't come up here. Strippers r crying.
She’s the kind of asshole whose face I want to put on a T-shirt just so I can go outside and burn it.
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