im letting my talent of no gag reflex go to waste
naighbors jacking off again. i swear its his friday night ritual, its like he knows the night wont be ending in his favor
margarita scented body wash shouldn't be used the morning after cuervo. there should be a warning on the label.
we need to stop having unprotected sex.
ya i know. we're like the secret life of the american whores.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Finished drinking tea out of a red party cup when I was done I flipped it without even thinking
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
FYI angry masturbation is not as cool angry sex
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
I was fine until "Under Pressure" came on the radio. It's like God wanted me to shit my pants on the drive home.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude. It's not even nine. I don't know yet.
Drink number four. Don't even tell me about its not even nine
You fucked that MILF against my car!
How would you know?
She scratched her name into my window with her bigass wedding ring. btw she wants you to call her
I think I gave a random lady a dildo
Again?!
Wait, there's no way I said I would suck his dick. I know drunk Katie.
No, you told him to suck YOUR dick.
See now that sounds like drunk Katie.
I finally got my restraining order in the mail. Was that supposed to upset me? I'm just over here like "TELLEM BOY BYE!-\nlegally..."
When i said you could use my car and have sex in the back....i wasn't being serious.
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