So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
sometimes i wish i was the girl in a porno. that way if i couldn't get any, i'd just order a pizza and do him.
we'll hang out once this whole, "your friends are robbers and drug addicts" thing blows over with my parents.
i wish that i had sketchier friends so that it would be easier to get drugs
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey! Thanks for asking, but it didnt go well. He threw up in the car on the way to dinner. Blind dates arent for everyone.
I came out of bedroom with my jeans on backwards, zipped AND buttoned. I have inconceivable talents whilst intoxicated.
That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
Left my card at the bar and had a drunk girl climb on the hood of my running car to scream at me.
I realised my life had gone downhill since being unemployed when I was making key lime pie on acid at 3am Tuesday morning.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
jen just told me ur idea of revenge was saluting while letting his bong float away while attached to some balloons.
I mean like if I stood up my head might pull me down like an anchor
Every time you talk about your facial hair I immedately get horny
She had never heard the term "grundle" before. Classiest girl I've met in months
If I'm not naked in the back of a cop car having sex by the end of the night, I did something wrong..
When the paramedic asked Logan how he fell he explained that he was trying to lick his eyeball, missed and tripped over his own tongue.
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