I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
So... 5th graders can't whisper for shit, but apparently I have an awesome rack.
Haha. Niice.
Yeah, I didn't know whether to be shocked or flattered.
both.
The only thing better than Call of Duty is getting jerked off while playing Call of Duty.
I just found pie in my hoodie pocket... This break needs to end.
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He kept waking up periodically throughtout the night to bit my ear and pass back out.
The walk home from the bar is FAR more shameful in daylight.
after that, he'll be sure to remember me. i'll probably forget him, but that's the way it should be.
Just say its a British thing. They wont know Its not. And if they say you're not British, proposition them for a post-sex game of cricket.
Drunk cheerio confetti may seem like a brilliant idea when your drunk, but believe me, the next day, its a horrible, horrible mess.
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He's acting like I should like him more than vodka and Taco Bell, but I just don't ser that happening.
I chugged vodka from a 15 ft snorkel. What the fuck did you do with your life today?
I think these people may actually be nudists. You know it's bad when I feel uncomfortable.
Let's run into the wild and just eat berries and have sex all the time.
Literally breaking up to my boyfriend while jamming out to Feraglicious
You kissed my hand and then put a Taco in it. Why WOUDNT I leave my husband?
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