I just spent the last hour reading customer reviews on amazon.com for the book "it hurts when I poop." Send help.
I didn't mind getting the stomach flu from him. we had great sex AND I'm seven pounds lighter
Just threw the poptarts. Sgits boutta go Down. 1 liter of wine
She said I had the biggest dick she'd ever seen. And when you consider how many she's come in contact with, it's kind of like winning the heisman.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Waking and baking has revolutionized how i brush my teeth. Seriously up to like 25 min everry morn. Highly recommend
Listen up tinkerbell, You're gonna come to the bar, hit on some fat chicks, and step up when I punch someone in the face.
You serve our country by fighting in the sandbox, i serve our country by entertaining rich businessmans' daughters. We each do our part.
He just sent me the contact information about getting the Zebra for graduation...
you said you didn't want to carry the pizza box so just folded up the pizza and put it in your pocket
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No I did not just post a Craigslist ad for a used stripper pole because I can't afford my own. But now that you put the idea in my head I might have to.
Threw up in hyvee parking lot. Thanksgiving shopping complete.
Dude...are you really going to start sexting during our friend's memorial service?
I also don't hate being called a giant sack of cheese. Is that weird?
in fetal position in his closet not sure if he knows im here... hugging his spongebob cake pan i stole.... now please come find me..
I just woke up and I don't really remember anything past 1pm. How much am I missing?
A good 10-11 hours. You got laid twice. Also, you out-ran a cop and played football with a lamp.
Randomize