But I thought everyone had breakup sex?
You insisted I take photos of you vomiting off the top of the tree.
I know its been a few months but you must know you hve the 2nd biggest dick I've ever seen. 1st place went to a rapper so don't feel bad.
He somehow managed to accomplish karate kicking a door down, cockblocking my friend in the room, and writing "tits" all over the house with a blue sharpie.
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I feel like a squirrel prepping for the winter on dollar beer nights.
I really don't think you should have 'baptized' your tattoo in vodka the same night you got it.
It was just a friend comforting a friend. Except his penis was inside of me.
I don't care who it's from we're getting blown. It's a 3 day weekend anything can happen
He just told me the blow job I gave him was like a journey
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Just puked off the 5th floor onto a car windshield. This is my life and I'm proud of it.
Well, we could've been at the bar taking a shot everytime my rash spread. But Noooooo. You had to go out with your non- girlfriend. Lame.
Last thing I remember was a hand in the pants. Then I woke up next to a full beer and a McDouble, which I promptly had for breakfast.
she keeps dunkaroos and gatorade in her bed. yep pretty sure im in love.
I'm good. But Nutella doesn't taste as good as it used to.
I pelvic thrusted so hard while he was eating me out that his nose started bleeding. I think it's broken. Trophy scars, right?
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