How, after 24 years of life, did I manage to revisit breastmilk
no, i dont want the owner to like me bc i dedazzled my vagina
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
Do you know how hard it is to masturbate with a runny nose?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The usual. Woke up on a dog bed with peeps and $11.
Mom just texted me to see if it was you who was streaking at the Mariner game... Did you accept yet another $1 bet?
You are like the only girl I know who tells their booty call to go find another girl just cause you want more sleep.
Yeah I remember doing the worm in my moms room. While she's yelling at me and I'm making seagull nooises
I say I hate my boss but I find myself jerking off to him more and more with each passing day
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just walked by a girl saying to her friend "honestly you coulda given me any dude and I woulda fucked him"
You should've introduced yourself
You're like my little fucked up version of the groundhog seeing its shadow, only it's boobs and warm weather.
Because you touch yourself at night.
...What time of day am I supposed to do it?
It’s just hard to believe you really care about me when u haven’t touched my dick in 2 months
Intoxication Level: I'm as graceful and flawless as a fucking dinosaur.
It was like mission impossible.
but with sex.
Randomize