dude. late night with jimmy fallon isnt even funny. the people in the audience there to see him dont even think hes funny.
kinda like you and your friends.
Hurry. And bring back up. SHE WON'T STOP TALKING.
she was throwing up and singing "I HAD a feeling that tonight was going to be a good good night." And yeah she was still in her dress.
Facebook stalking a girl from Germany is harder then you think.you have to copy and paste all this shit into freetranslations.com then try and piece together an awkward sentence. If only I could put this energy into something productive.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When my alarm went off, he rolled over and asked me: Bacon or dick? Yes, I will see him again.
hey. so did i get tied up by a jumprope last night?
Some girl, somewhere, is going to wake up with my face paint on her vagina
He told me the color of his piss. Worst. First date. Ever.
I'm beer bonging chocolate fondue. That's how my Valentines Day is going.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Putting Chia seeds in beer makes it ok for my diet, right?
Just got offered a dog by two Meth head's one of which wasn't wearing shoes and continually saying "fuck"
I think id rather titty fuck an A cup than deal with what happened tonight again. shits depressing
According to my snapchat story, I tore a fake wig off a security guard and ran away with it.
If a cop comes up to me I'm whipping out my cock, swinging it around and singing the national anthem
Are you ok? Who pooped in my office?
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