sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
I lost count of how many people I peed on last night.
In the hospital waiting to be tested for the first uti of the school year....I'm BACK BTICHES.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I ate the snowman's head. That is not a drug euphemism.
I just want dates and sex but the option to have that with whoever whenever I want
I let a drunk, gay man in a dragon costume motor-boat me. With his dragon head.
It's a "nonproductive" (vocab word) cough. It's like a constant tickle in my throat, like there's a little elf with feathers for feet going Gangnam style on my "uvula" (vocab word).
Did he ask you why you were in his back yard Sunday night?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You showed your tits for hundreds of beads but magically became shy when there was food on the line
Somehow you're a lightweight AND an alcoholic. Rare combo in one person. Well done.
You kept running around yelling "I need my pajamas" & then you got naked. Shit just went downhill from there.
just said thank you to the lady who gave me a body search at the airport
Don't try to butter me sideways
That is without a doubt the most Southern thing you have ever said.
So, I woke up under a table with an alarm clock on my face, my hair in a bag of popcorn, and my phone charger wrapped around me.. what happened?
Randomize