i should go to a nude beach and wear just a condom, then ill have tan lines on my dick
walked into the kitchen nd asked my mom what smells like tuna she replies" your sister" now i cant eat tuna...EVER!!!
I know it should be off bounds, but can this be the chick we all sleep with at some point? I can write it off as drunken mistake, you all just have to come up with equally good excuses
i just drank the rest of the vodka . Btw why did we put candy corn in it?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't decide who is the bigger alcoholic: you for opening that bottle of wine just now or me for hearing it in the other room over the air conditioner
Let's enter the circle of trust. Are we there yet? Ok. If I somehow hypothetically slept with Amandas ex husband...on a scale of one to ten...how bad is that?
mom just made me 'sorry-you-have-hpv-pancakes'
We are getting high tomorrow and being statues at the cafeteria. Come find us.
We're having chugging races with long island ice tea, I won. To often
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How much do you charge for your Funyun and beer delivery service?
WHEN JENDA BENDA THE DRAG QUEEN TELLS YOU TO RUN, YOU RUN, BITCH!!!
You randomly sent me a black Santa Claus emoji at 2am. I think alcohol was involved.
he's not even weird he's been offering me different drinks all night
oh i remember now hes the guy that liked when i peed on him
We're both fucking guys named Frank. Our friendship was meant to be.
Tinder has really served to stimulate the number of sex related demons summonings.
Randomize