do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
His whole family saw that I had cum in my hair once they turned on the blacklight at the bowling alley. You should have seen his mother's face.
Dude, somewhere around here makes 4loko slushies. I just decided coming home isn't so bad.
it got awkward when the only couple not hooking up was just watching..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You were telling the cab driver that you believe in him and just to follow his dreams
Advice for you. Never grate cheese on your counter then not cleanup the scraps, then have your bf over and endup having sex on the counter. Theres literally cheese melted in and around my ass.
And I just had to awkwardly tell 3 police officers that I was having sex and not in any trouble
Is there a particular reason why everyone is now calling you Butt Doctor?
if i had known the extra weight would have gone to my tits, i would have started drinking years ago
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just introduced myself to a group of people and one dude said "You're Marc!? I've heard many a legend of you." I raised bottle of champagne, said cheers, and drank with them.
you went to ralph's and bought all of their pears and left them outside my house
My liver is fucking rocky. Get knocked down 7 times and gets up 8. World champ
Worst. Date. Ever. He peeled a layer of bread off his mini burger buns because they had "too many carbs".
He brought over a bottle of tequila and a box of donuts with the Plan B, so I guess you could say things are getting pretty serious.
This is my second month of college and all I've learned is how to get a guy to go down on me without asking out loud and not to chase everclear with Smirnoff ice.
Essential life skills
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