absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
That's what you get when you play shuffleboard drunk.
What's wrong?
Long week. Sore muscles. Bad back. Hangover. Mini-keg. Crazy ex-wife. Unavailable love-interest. Dead celebrity families. Republicans.
Pussy.
You can't have hate sex in a hallway!!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
Freshman Move In Day, its like Christmas in August.
Dude, how the hell did you become an RA?
Jared is "trying to bite a strangers hat off" drunk. Oh, and that stranger is a girl at a table of 5 guys, one girl.
I'm sooo hungover. I fell asleep on top of a car in a parking lot last night. New one to add to the list.
i just wrote an ode to an enchilada dorito. i'll need that pregnancy test now please.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just got breakfast in bed and he went down on me. And you though he was a bad idea. Shame
Our relationship needs a sober moment
I'll call you when that happens
Just banged your ex. So it really is 'him, not you' in that he's gay. Rodeo champion gay.
for the record im never blowing a guy on the toilet again, that was sad and degrading
When you wear a dress that resembles the shape and color of Kirby to a wedding, you get the attention you deserve.
don’t ask me. i snorted coke off of a pregnancy test box last night. i obviously don’t make the best life choices.
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