Wanted to apologize for chris browning you when you were on my computer.
I think i peed on brittanys purse
Just saw the pics you left in my phone. thanks for reminding me that last night was not a dream.
Just wrote a paper about alcohol abuse that sounded like my weekend...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Rick Santorum just suspended his campaign. Lets celebrate by watching gay pornography together.
PAAAANTS ARE FOR AAAASSHOLES
He's both a cowboy and a firefighter. Saying "no" was not an option.
Fuck you, I'm yelling at a mountain right now
Come back. Shots need mouths.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Thanks so much for having me, I'm really sorry that I almost caused your dog to catch on fire and also for breaking your doorknob
I need to hire someone full-time to slap food and dick away from me.
Well I got black out drunk before the rehearsal dinner and berated my family with insults. But other then that it was a good time
So, i might have left my morals back in 2011.
I've come to the conclusion that my issue is I'm not fucking a guy with a headboard
Currently eating a pop tart in my underwear waiting for the washer. Not one of my prouder moments.
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