btw.sex in the wood isnt as romantic as it seems.heels kept sinking in the dirt and pine needles were sticking to the fishnets
i wish i had your life
I tried to throw up out of my window but I forgot there was a mesh screen.
My roomate just said the he would "tap dat" to the 13 out of control girl on maury. Im finding a new place in the morning.
her dad is making me watch Glen Beck, i only agreed because i penetrated his daughter earlier.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I had a terrible day! The only thing that makes me feel better is knowing Jack Bauers day was worse.
Come find me please? Im in a ditch.
That doesn't help me much...
I'm right under the moon!
Omg. I bid $3000 on a cave in Afghanistan on EBay last night.
He is to the point where he forgot I was in the front seat of his car while he was taking me home...that stoned
Really, thanks for buying me caribou, it helped me out. Today will forever be the day I threw up in a caribou cup in the skyway outside of chipotle.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why didn't I see you last night!?
We made out like 4 times....I think I saw you.
If my mom walks in on me masturbating one more time I'm moving out
You'd think the first few times would have been enough
Beer acquired. Food is cooking
Wow, you are almost sliding into home plate for some stellar fellatio
I'm taking a dab in mourning of how long its been since I smoked with you guys.
I had to put my dog down, accidentally outed my brother, and was given a fucking fish sandwich instead of a Big Mac ALL IN ONE DAY! Am I really the person you want to consult for advice? Hhhmmmmmm?
I just woke up with a cowboy hat on my face and a playboy from the 90s on my chest
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