so i was pissing and the phone rang but i forgot i was pissing so i just ran to answer the phone. it was too late when i realized
we were so high we made up an elaborate backstory because we were paranoid about going into the wig shop w/o being serious wig shoppers
Oh my god. I think I just sexted my mom...
What?!
Fwd: Ride me, you sleek sleek woman!!!
He said he got a lot of action last night. I asked how much? And he said he got to see down her shirt. Freshmen never cease to amaze me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Stole every fake plant from the lobby and placed it in front of you're apartment door, Enjoy!
Just successfully went through airport security with shrooms. It's gonna be a fucking awesome new years
well I already know I'm going to hell, at this point it's really go big or go home
Tonight, I'll be cleaning. And by cleaning, I mean drinking booze and spraying everything with Febreze.
Either I'm tripping balls or my dog has super powers.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my memory may be fuzzy, but the 20+ naked pictures I sent him were surprising clear
The walk home lasted longer than the sex. He lives in the flat above the bar.
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
I was planning out a scrapbook to memorialize my affair.......and that's when it hit me, I don't make good choices. On the upside, the scrap book came out great and I am glad I saved all the gate passes from the airport.
I'm looking for whatever I can find, and afford without having to eat my emotional support cat
somehow getting chased by a bulldozer was NOT on my to-do list for today. just saying
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