Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
She was drunk and kept trying to talk while I was in her mouth. It sounded like the teacher from a Charlie Brown cartoon!
woke up this morning with a pool of champagne in my purse. apparently i was saving it for later.
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm sitting in the middle of them on his bed, forcing them to watch Brokeback Mountain. I am the best cock blocker ever.
remember, YOU ARE A WINNER
my dinner was a box of cheezits simultaneously mixed in with cocoa puffs and fried rice.
Your brother came in a girls mouth for the first time last night... Ah the tales told whilst buying minors beer.
The first aid guy just told us to go get hammered...I'm taking his advice
Not my type. One of those types that loves that they're educated, could drink their red wine and have an intellectual conversation and have a wonderful time
An adult?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Interesting occurrence: the application I use to keep track of my periods and sexual encounters just notified me it had been over 4 months since you were logged as an active partner and ask if I'd like to remove you from my options. Wow, kmsl.
She literally took off her shirt and ran out of the bar. When she ran back she smashed into the glass door with her face....That's got to be the best way to celebrate your 30th.
I just saw someone dressed as a bear leave your house on a motorcycle. I guess you guys are having a good time.
Pretty sure this ice cream truck is following me.
is it bad that there is a girl in my bed right now and the only thing i can think about is the fect that its after 3am which means i cant order jimmyjohns unitll tomorrow?
yeah....try hearing them in person. it sounds like two muppets going at it
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