Hey, It's Lauren. i wanted to talk to you tonight. I like you, as you know because kyle told you. I was wondering if you liked me too?
Are you in the third fucking grade? Check yes or no.
his ringtone is the jonas brothers. get me the fuck out of here NOW.
I woke up hungover and reached for a glass of water only to realize too late that it was vodka sprite with my splooge in it.
he has 3 profile pictures up and all of them are him riding jet skis
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like a really awesome person when i have to check my roof for things i've lost
You went from loaded cattleman, to football player, to better football player, to art major from Missouri. Your future was looking so good for a while.
You stole a frozen pizza from the freezer, stuffed it in the back of your shirt then proceeded to leave the party.
Just cleaned someone else's sperm off of my bedroom wall. Never throwing a house party again.
Exactly. Stay back and unsubscribe from her
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need time to grow out my leg hair and not be sad anymore
It's just unfortunate that I still have the image of him having sex with me fresh in my mind
Also a shrinking boner emoji would be helpful
This is the third time this month a guy I’m not dating has dumped me. How is this even possible???
I came and sneezed at the same time. Words can't describe how awesome it was.
Opening my shipments of mascara and nipple pasties this morning like a boss bitch
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