I just peed or puked all or around my parjibgb lot.
parking. I am not drunk
it was 6 in the morning, and you cried until i put mulan in. then you proceeded to say every word, not to mention sing along... stop drinking.
He showed me one of his balls and said "this one's free. you'll have to work to see the other.."
i hope youre ready for a shit show because we just ordered a whole pitcher of red headed sluts
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I felt so bad for you. Drunk Rachael wanted nothing more than to crawl into the cop car and give you a hug. Luckily Mollied/Barred out Rachael convinced Drunk Rachael this was a terrible idea. So I ran. I have your keys btw
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
playing nyquil roulette. it entails taking shots of nyquil and hoping it doesnt kick in during sex or in public. game on.
Because guys aren't supposed to cry. Especially when it's over a dude singing a Christmas carol.
I would date him. For 1 month. Just so I could say I was a trap queen for 1 month.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it a problem if I'm trying to condition Goodbye Horses to trigger an erection?
He is a real estate investor who’s face I’m going to sit on.
He just got back from doing field research studying wild chimpanzees in the goddamn jungle. Obviously I fucked him.
Decisions were made. The quality of them will be judged tomorrow
Remember when we thought adulthood would be different than college?
It is different. We had hopes and dreams back then. Now we're just alcoholics.
Try sleeping with him.
Why is it that all my gay friends have that solution...
Cuz you will have an answer or have sex.
Randomize