My room smells like vodka and shame
Ambien. No doubt about it.
never have i ever had a craving for dick this badly
Those strippers last night smelled great. It was the perfect mixture of vanilla and daddy issues.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wonder if you could grow some weed in a chia pet
thats the last time i clean cum out of my retainer.
literally followed a trail of condoms to the bus stop this morning. Ahh modern-day bread crumbs
my little brother just told me that I should start chasing my vodka with slim fast. genious.
Just woke up with three stitches in my left boob. Nevertheless, I think I'm going to like this school.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You broke a cabinet. You were climbing up it and it collapsed on you. Lines were crossed.
My gynecologist inadvertently complimented your penis.
I left two shots of jager for you guys when you wake up from your death. Do with it as you wish
I woke up naked under desk at her apt once during my freshman year. I should have known that friendship was of a different breed...
Did I fall on/off the boat yesterday? Cuz my right leg looks and feels like if it got hit by shrapnel.
My cat just smacked my blunt from my hand and then put her head in my hand. I don't know how to feel
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