I'll bet she douches with gravy.
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
You'd think me telling him that I'm a lesbian would make him realize that I don't want to hook up with him.
when I sang my humps to you I meant it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You've been drinking wine and eating bacon all afternoon. HOW IS THAT DOING GOOD?!?!
We have a pile of chopped wood here that suggests we may have chopped down a tree of some sort.
Today marks the 365th consecutive day of jerkin it. I couldn't have done it without you guys. #onlynewyearsresolutionaccomplished
I think I was the only one who knew you were acting like you weren't drunk in public issues discussion this morning. Make sure you thank me in your Academy Award Speech someday.
ETSY JUST SENT ME AN EMAIL WITH THE SUBJECT "SUMER ROMANCE" I'M BEYOND FUCKING DONE
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't remember anything. Melissa just said I kept saying welcome to the bat cave
logically I know i should probably study somewhere outside my dorm room, but if I do that then I cant drink and smoke half as much while i study
i just teared up watching channing tatum in drag emerge from the fog on lip sync battle. it's gotta be PMS. either that or something is realllllly wrong with me.
Hold on, I'm taking nudes in a blanket fort right now
I'm high. I apologize for that last sentence
Me and dad were just reflecting on that time he found a gas mask bong in the backyard.
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