I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
the fair has chocolate covered bacon...impossible is nothing.
My doctor just informed me that my food allergies qualify me for a medical marijuana license. I get it on Tuesday. It won't help at all, but my life is awesome!
I just shot gunned a beer for your birthday alone because you're too hungover at midnight to get out of bed. I'm not sure which of us is the bigger loser
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
how many dildos make it a "collection?"
i should probably stop thinking with my vagina, and start using that $70, 000 education i can't afford. what the fuck.
I just masturbated and watched youtube makeup videos, which was just an extension of masturbation.
You yelled to anyone that tried to help you "I have a burrito, what else could a girl want?"
my goal for the rest of college is to escape STD free. fuck getting a job. this is more important.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There. Isnt. A. Single. Person. Who. Is. Not. High. At. Church.
So it's official the pockets of my work apron exist solely for the purpose of secretly flipping off asshole customers and not losing my job.
When he's drowning in your chest and he muffles out the words 'I just want to live here' that's a compliment right?
After an orgasm, I always feel the urge to sing A Whole New World from the move Aladdin and I'm not quite sure why.
I don't know, we got really drunk and I slapped her with an ear of corn.
you're now officially the 3000 mile booty call. congrats.
Randomize