Pretty sure I only gave out my other # though. You know, 777 777-7777
Hahaha. So was it a Freudian slip, or wishful thinking? ;)
Could be either seeing as you're in my phone as "3rd bar" and I couldn't pick you outta a line up.
If you want to dance with a less than stellar Asian chick, I have just the girl for you.
I could write a book called "things that come out of my vagina"
Just accidentally pinched my dick between two 50 pound dumbbells while doing shoulder shrugs. God hates me.
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you kept saying 'can i put my penis on the grill?' and it was all i could do to stop you. you're welcome, though
I have shoes on. No pants. And my jacket pockets are full of ketchup and grass. Yes. Good night.
it's too soon in the relationship to think about him when i masturbate. so i think about his dad instead.
I'm playing a game where i judge myself by whats in my cart. Also have 3 bright red giant buckets
the coastal evacuation route ends at my vagina so you can just skip the bullshit and come over
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He broke up with me over the phone while I was getting my bush waxed into a "D" for his surprise birthday present. Talk about bad timing...
We got drunk and crashed a fifty year old woman's birthday party for the food. Whoops.
Should I have spent my entire pay check on Crown Royal and LSD? No. Do I regret it? Also, no.
I'm gonna snort this pill I found on the ground cause that's how classy I am. Watch football and eat Beef jerky. Domesticated at its finest.
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
all my friends are getting married and here i am in a committed relationship with rum
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