just credit carded her and her mom at the same time... that drunk. get on my level
I'm thankful she wil die Alone. And I'm thankful I slept wiht her cousin. And brother.
Legitimate logistical question....how did you pee in your duct tape dress?
Ive consumed more rum studying for law school finals than I did that time I fucked that fat chick in the back of VW Beetle. It's all ugly, but for different reasons.
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I have acquired 14 pictures of hard dicks tonight... I was on a mission. Don't even pretend you aren't proud.
I just took my birth control with a water bottle I found in my purse with vodka in it in Spanish class. 10am is still too early for me.
This is love.
Which part? The alcoholic cupcakes or the lesbian st paddys day party?
Thank you, I really appreciate that. I know I couldn't participate in class tonight and I hope that doesn't affect my grade too much. So please let me know of any extra credit opportunities such as fellatio
I'm just over here all sober hanging with two high people talking about how they're "free-spirited stallions."
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We were on a plane, I couldn't just grab his dick
You know i love you, but i just cannot fuck you until your eyebrow grows back. It's too hard not to laugh.
Betting for two different teams with two different guys is the best. Time to get $100 by one guy and laid by the other!
And the 'kicked out of Xmas party' trophy goes to me. 3rd nomination, first win.
It's like I'm tryna ride my horse through dennis quaid’s vineyard
That's a sexy sentence
there is glitter all over my balls
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