All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
I may have been to starbucks and 2 classes with balls still written on my face...
I like to melt taper candles in my wine bottles the next day, it makes my drinking trophies more classy, and makes me look like less of an alcoholic.
i left after you tried to balance a shot of tequila on your head while screaming at the bar tender that you fucked his girlfriend
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nobody has ever asked me for my honest opinion on whether they needed anal bleaching before
There is a good chance that the other night after a wedding reception i was at that i mailed you a drink coaster.
Called the cops on a high school party then went in after all the kids ran away and took the rest of the beer. What are you doing tonight?
I have to be at work in a hour. Can you sufficiently fuck me in 35 minutes?
He just stared me dead in the eye as he continued to beat off. Then said "you were going to catch me sooner or later".
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Uh yeah can we get an age of consent check on Dave's penis?
Age of consent, Dave's penis. Thank you...
FOUND: my underwear in the cabinet above the toilet. What the actual fuck.
She found the planted magnum condom..once she figured it out it was too late.
So last night took an interesting turn.. Never thought I'd say I had to pick up my glasses off the floor of a strip club
at least its a cool name to shout when he's balls deep in you later
Interesting. All i can really say is humanoid shaped doritos bags melting very slowly
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