im ready to get crazy and take my wig off
I thought she had blonde hair
No, Gonorrhea actually
just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's a skull full of vodka. How bad can it be?
I thought I walked in on an orgy of smurfs. Man I love shrooms
I remember three things: you falling down an entire flight of stairs, me stripping out of your Christmas one-sie to do cartwheels in my underwear, and people standing above me saying, "where did that bump on her head come from?"
Also, I was told I kept the antlers on the entire time. I'm deeming last night a success.
dude to be honest with you there is a used condom that ive just left on my floor for three days
you have got to get your shit together
I give you full permission to fuck a rando on my air mattress.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How are you not embarrassed to know me. I'm a mess right now. I'm a walking, talking tornado of embarrassment
Maybe you need to change your pickup move. The "hey check these out" titty flash gets you the wrong kinda man.
Just killed a snake in my bed! And by killed I mean hit repeatedly with my fist. And by snake I mean a lump in the covers. And I pissed my pants.
Is it okay to send him a "thanks for the sexual awakening" note?
If I could run through a field of Reece's and Oreos, dive off a milkfall into a bowl of cereal. My Life would complete.
I'm just gonna back away slowly and come back when there's less weird crap.
Randomize