Getting food. Want anything?
Vagina. Double meat no buns. I have the secret sauce
So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
24 hour fitness called offering me a free trial stating that you referred them to me. I told them you have been taking pics of naked guys in the locker room and selling them online.
That's not a bad idea, actually...
turns out I still hate jay leno...even at 10pm.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
you went up to him and asked if you could have "friend sex." He looked like a 7 year old on christmas morning
He sat there and debated the pros and cons of hooking up with me
Also, drinking coors light. Fuck that. Fuck that in the fucking face.
After he finished going down on me he came up from under the covers, threw his hands into the air and shouted "take that lesbians!" and finished with "and we have dicks!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Waiting to interview and found a beer in my purse from last night
Suspicion confirmed. my mom has her nipples pierced
Way to crack the case Nancy Drew
BABE I MISS YOU SO MUCH LIKE THE SADNESS OVERWHELMS BONER ABILITY
I'm allotting you four buildings to piss on tonight. Choose wisely.
Thanks to you I just drunkenly spot washed a Star Wars hoodie, at midnight on a Friday. If there is a greater level of nerdiness I do not know of its existence
So when did "Are you okay?" translate into "Don't tell me you got fucked by another rando after another rager"?
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