when you close your eyes do you see, that mystical creature will be me.
who is this?
He made me pinky-promise that he gave me an orgasm.
I wish there were college classes that were useful to your daily life, like how to pack a proper bowl in pitch black darkness.
This needs to stop. I just vacuumed the wall. Adderall is a double edged sword.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Meeting girls and telling em you have no hair on your calves is not an acceptable pick up line
dude you said you were going to be a human flag and climbed the telephone pole and fell in front of a car
Please say a prayer for the elevator people at work today. My farts are significantly more potent the day after hitting that korean place for lunch...
I have learned that if you don't want to hook up with the guy who walked you home, food is great compensation.
Our host-mom was rubbing her back sympathetically going "muy bien, chica" while she puked on the beach. So yeah, I think we got the best one.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The holidays are too long. I always run out of adderall before I run out of family. you got any left?
Her instagram is literally selfies, cats, and guys she's fucked.
YOU TRIED TO SWIM IN HER FISHTANK. I don't think she's going to call you.
I was on tinder the whole time I was waiting for my pregnancy test results at the doctors.
Refresh my memory....were we forced to leave or did we choose to leave?
I don't know what the hell I'm going to do with myself when this is all over. I'll probably just go back to smoking pot and trying to learn italian.
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