I just did the math, I've had 8 hours of sleep in the last 3 days. Not sure if that means I am dedicated to my sex life or my job...
He's coming over, and I hope he doesn't get hungry. I'm sure its not proper protocol to bring one booty call to another booty call's house for the munchies.
You just kept shouting "I AM AN ADULT!" until he agreed to carry you home on his shoulders.
im sure shes a lovely person but i cant be friends with someone that doesnt drink. its just not right.
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I was throwing up in the shower. He was throwing up on me. It was a cute couple moment for us.
Walking through campus with a grocery bag full of pot brownies. I'm like the santa claus of 4/20
Shotgunning beers to finish a midterm project at 3am is a good idea right?
Literally if she wants to make a big deal, I'd rather have shit smeared on my face.
I almost put an adult beverage in my sippy cup for the beach but realized the next step would be rehab.
No the next step is being buzzed at the beach. I would've.
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Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
Well. Now I feel like I put pants on for nothing.
walk of shamed to graduation. ending college with a bang....
Thanks for having me over last night. Sorry I licked rum off your kitchen floor.
I'm sorry for what I said when I was orgasming
I'm still here... I feel so bad wearing your mom's cardigan at a strip club 🙈
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