i need a penis for penetration, you wont do.
oh yeah... my b.
it's too hot outside to masturbate.
I printed and framed a picture of a seagull shitting, and hung it in my house. I'm waiting to see how long it takes everyone to notice.
i either bought an eighteen year old girl or i'm engaged to her... i'm not quite sure
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So I was gonna stay in tonight but the president got me motivated! I will not quit. Bars here I come.
my brother is about to go smoke a joint outside... he's preparing his munchies on the counter beforehand. I admire his responsibility.
after giving each other head, we had a really nice post-oral heart to heart. found out he lost his virginity in a threesome.
Im sitting alone watching titanic. Drunk. Without pants. Holding a fishing pole. Im pretty sure im okay with all of this.
Just come here and visit. Enjoy the deliciousness of me being legal. Just don't think, and come here right meow. meow meow meow.
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This whole bra on the outside of my shirt thing is so convenient. It turns my shirt into a pocket to eat Fritos out of. Mmm boobies
BTW rolling him off the couch and onto that tarp was pure genius. He definitely pissed himself last night.
You straight up wore me out. This should be a proud moment for you. It's almost like my penis is asking for a timeout. But not really
It's truly amazing how much porn I can get in while my phones at 1% battery life.
Literally had sex in his grow room under a plant.. ganja queen .
Are you still in his room?
Nope, yogged home at 8 am with one shoe on.
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