It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
yeah, and when i walked in on them fucking he said "go away, i'm making sons."
i woke up with a wedding ring drawn on my finger...if this was vegas id be worried
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Our new goal for this summer is to fuck so hard we lose his security deposit.
All I know is he mentioned whips, leather cuffs, and a riding crop. It's like Halloween, Christmas, and My birthday all in one. a 5 year old couldn't even possibly be this excited.
I just had to explain to my 62 year old advisor what "tea-bagging" was in the middle of her lecture. I smell extra credit. And maybe a demonstration.
I kind of drew a blank when the doctor asked me how I got super glue up my nose.
you're being fucking weird and i don't like it. text me when you're not being the after picture on a poster for rehab
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Halfway through she said I was exactly like she imagined. So many things have been stroked this night.
I dealt with the imported moonshine, but when the cocaine came out, I had to get the fuck out of there
HE JUST ALLUDED TO FUCKING MY FRESH LOAF OF BREAD
At this point, I wouldn't be surprised if he laughs at all of our attempts to keep him sober.
Ran up to the dollar store to get batteries for my vibrator. Happy Valentines Day!
For future reference: bathtub full of cheeseburgers = win.
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