i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
i dont know you, but i just did a line with your business card.
He just gave a drunken 7 minute speech on how to make the perfect grilled cheese. he explained types of butter and cheeses....i think i love him
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I think winning the long island race means you lose at life
I have a feeling she doesn't appreciate me as a person. She only fucks me because I look like Harry Potter.
His fucking was so lame I considered painting my nails during...
I really want to lead this Amish guy into temptation
Its not college unless your study breaks were to go throw up from blacking out the night before
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At some point you realize they're vacuuming and you still have to sober up. Please find me a boyfriend thanks .
I started scrolling back in our texts looking for context and a picture of your dick rose like the Great Pumpkin in the middle of my screen.
If you come home and I'm pantsless with cake smeared all over my face, I'm sorry.
I immediately regret the tequila decision.
I just shotgunned a beer and my lipstic didnt BUDGE. MERICUHH
I'm just gonna back away slowly and come back when there's less weird crap.
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