butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
making cat noises will not fix the situation.
There was a suspicious looking plate that suggests I may have eaten salad with gravy
Whoever I saved in my phone as "Jackpot" last night has your keys.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He told me to put on my big boy pants, then take them off and fuck her before he smacks me with a chair. His pep talks suck.
The countdown is at hand. We are 15 days from so much Jameson that names will be forgotten. Prepare your liver now or severe projectile vomiting will be the theme of the night.
It's like a new game! Find out if he's circumcised without actually seeing it
I just wanna say I did some math and I lasted 1,052,000 more minutes than you at the bar before I got kicked out. That's 729 days. Bitch
Steve brought 6 joints and 2 bottles of makers mark, Josh shat himself in the pool, and Amy blew me. Hope that extra 3 dollars an hour for working overnights is still worth it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just remembered I made you punch yourself in the face last night and I would like to formally apologize for that even though it was hilarious.
My feelings for him are donzo molonzo but I can't turn down a pierced penis...
Um that's okay I got up on the table at IHOP and terrorized the entire restaurant for a phone charger after I stole the whip cream from the kitchen and started eating it out the can
Dude, I just feel great. I love life so much and I love you. Love. Love. So much love.
So, I need to know. Why did you spraypaint your underwear gold?
He wouldn’t know a good thing if it bit him on the ass. Which, btw, I did.
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