dude i totally did the walk last night came out of her room to see her dad sitting there straight lookin at me...wtf
I want a gay best friend. or apple sauce either one is fine with me
I don't think I have ever puked up that much free breakfast in my life...thank god for Nickle Beers.
Sorry really high. We have no lighter so we're lighting the bowl with rolled up paper towels lit by candle which also lit with a rolled up paper towel that we lit with the stove eye
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If I remember who won the superbowl tomorrow morning.. I think I'm just going to quit drinking. There really won't be a point anymore
Was it a good night or a bad night when you have to apologize to someone the next day for trying to fuck them with a turtle?
You don't understand. He was so ginger that he could make red hair a dominant gene. And I refuse to torture my future spawn like that.
Dude he was freaking out because he thought he was walking on crates, and he just kept saying help me
i'm calling it my monica lewinsky shirt now. may it live forever in infamy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Master Skywalker, there are too many of them. What am I going to do?
Hit on the one in the red shorts. The thirst is strong with this one.
On the upside, no one went to the hospital! Lex's friend was definitely on fire at one point last night though because he tried to juggle tiki torches. He was shirtless this morning and smelled like a BBQ.
I asked him to change the channel. There was no way I could do reverse cowgirl with golf on.
Shower wine is way better than shower beer.
Do you think they manscape in the zombie apocalypse?
Ya know. I was thinking of my slutty moments the other day and finally know which one makes the number 1 spot.
Randomize