Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
So how was awkward coffee with forgets-your-name?
He said "ride me pocahontas" while I was on top of him last night
I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I forgot if I was chewing my gum or my tongue
Also, if someone could cut me off before im rolling around the yard pantsless with a 40 year old lesbian that would be awesome.
All I really remember is shouting "THANKS FOR LETTING ME MAKE OUT WITH YOUR GIRLFRIEND."
What can I say? You have this amazing power over straight girls.
I'll come hang out with you guys later, but right now my parents aren't home and I have to take full advantage of being able to watch porn on full blast.
WEED IS MY SPIRIT ANIMAL
That one probably shouldn't have been in caps
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Its 8 in the morning and I wouldn't pass a breathalyzer test, How's your day been?
Costco (TM). Making alcoholism affordable!
The wedding is over. Operation sleep with my step-sister has officially begun
Some guy is here to get laser hair removal on his balls. I hate my job.
FYI bail money is still in my drawer. I know you have no car but you need to know this for tomorrow.
I know I may be showing my age by saying this but this is the first time I have been eaten out in the parking lot behind the Clairmont Inn since 1990
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