Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
he actually used the line "do you have a map, because i'm lost in your eyes" and i was to drunk to care
just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?
She made Precious look like a solid 6.5.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Vodka + horseback riding = vomit in the saddle bags
I thanked her for the handjob she gave me in the middle of the night. She had no idea what i was talking about. I think she sleep-jerked-me-off. Im def sleeping over tonight too
Good, she had spurs on her boots. That is a sign for instant herp attack.
If you haven't gone to the store yet. Can you PLEASE get me some clippers my balls will thank you later
I'm now drinking beer through a straw. By order of the bartender.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
With a few pieces of metal and duct tape and a bong was created
I started scrolling back in our texts looking for context and a picture of your dick rose like the Great Pumpkin in the middle of my screen.
I literally am filling up a victoria's secret bag with stuff that would give my parents a heart attack to hide in my roommates' room. This is being an adult when parents visit
There’s a special place in hell for tall guys with small dicks
hopefully I won't be diving through a thorn bush to escape an explosion this time
don’t ask me. i snorted coke off of a pregnancy test box last night. i obviously don’t make the best life choices.
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