I swallowed and made him pancakes in the morning. I feel almost as desperate as Jennifer Aniston at this point.
we couldnt tell if he was gay so we started working glee quotes into the conversation to see if he noticed.
i realized our last day of finals is on cinco de mayo....it's god's way of saying drink ridiculous amounts of tequila and wear sombreros
Got drunk. Then they sung "we didnt start the fire" to my other cousin who accidentally burnt down the house when she was younger.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I FUCKING SERVED PEOPLE AND POURDED JUGS AND GOT FREE BEEEEEEEERERTERRY
Dude, all I remember was you grabbing random girls, yelling "It's a rap video!" and pouring high-life on them.
I'm not taking advise from someone who responded to the pickup line "I have a penis"
We met a guy named Raymond. You called him ramen all might and told him you would eat him up, "like sex, on a budget."
Back. Waiting on Thong the shuttle bus driver. THONG
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
his first fb message to me in 3 years was "is your cock open for business?" im blocking him
There's a kid in the back of the class drinking out of a flask. Like what is going on?
NOW HE'S DRINKING OUT OF A HANDLE. WHO IS THIS KID?
My husband gave me a key to his house. I thinks this means we're getting kinda serious.
Be there in 20. Want icecream?
sex. I want sex. I like where your heads at though.
Literally.... Guy kissing himself in mirror in this hotel elevator
It was like Strip poker and blow, but with Yu-Gi-Oh cards
Randomize