So he flipped me over and suddenly went limp then told me he was thinking about his ex.
so you punched his junk, right?
Ryan Reynolds porn could be a WMD. Have a giant TV on the front of your tank, and just drive around playing it. Everyone dies of orgasm overload.
That's it. Iraq is done. Everyone dies, game over man.
i think im having one of those erections lasting four or more hours
Just wrote a paper about alcohol abuse that sounded like my weekend...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He started crying and showing me pictures of his ex. she was really pretty. It's an honor to have shared a penis with her.
So how does it feel getting boo'd by the entire 5 guys restaurant
Having to explain to my dad why there are chicken wings to the pool filter, new low.
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
when the washing machine is on all the beer bottles jiggle and clink against each other... "drink us drink us drink us"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
getting busted for public urination is like, a step above j-walking. you'll be fine
"Yeah because the first thing I think of when I hear the word college is tear gas."
I just wanna get drunk and go sledding in my kayak
I'm gonna go parent style on your ass... I don't ask much from you but if you could please just come get shitfaced with me I would really appreciate it
Is it appropriate to be taking shots at 11 on sunday?
Absolutely same thing as church only different
Your mom asked you why you had bite marks all over your arms and you answered her by yelling "I HAD A SIESTA!"
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