Im wearin a dollar bill hat and tgkin a big girl home. Lifi is gmwnd
totally poinked my lawyers daughter in his hot tub last night. i figure getting off is just compensation for not getting me off.
his mom walked in, looked at me, sighed n nsaid 'when are u gonna learn' n walked out
I wonder if you can snort coke upside down
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The bartender asked if I wanted a to-go cup for my crown and coke.....I just realized I'm back in Montana and fuck did I miss home.
Sundays should be dedicated to Girl Scout cookies, sex, and super hero movies.
I just wish I could congratulate your tits on how much I love seeing them
If you want me to retract my crazy cat lady comments pictures of yourself dressed as a cat are not the way to do it.
Goodbye spring break, hello depressing video on AIDS.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I found out his moms name, maiden name, profession, and office location, his dads name and profession, his home phone, picture of their house, all of his work profiles, and the cost of their house. All I'm trying to do is find his damn twitter
I just sneezed glitter I JUST SNEEZED G LITTER I j u st SneeZED GLIT TER I DO NOT HAVE TIME FOR THIS AT ALL.
Just bought plan b at 8am. Then the cashier asked if I wanted to donate to the children's miracle network. Fml
did the thing where I quickly swipe right to every girl on Tinder & matched with my sis. God I hope swiping carelessly is hereditary
Do you remember punching the light out in the bathroom? I didn't, and that was at bar 2 of 4…
You know that we wouldn’t even be talking about all this if you would have kept your candy consumption judgement comments to yourself.
Randomize