I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
I am so stoned and my professor is handing out candy. I love Halloween.
I like your house better though. Cause it has febreeze and lube.
I don't think you have any idea how kinky that sounds.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she has a picture of her daughter riding a giant rooster.. of course i want to make obscene cock jokes
I'm gonna keep a minimum of five drink promise to myself
You mean maximum 5?
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
Now, one of you come feed me, the other read me my physics book...I'm too hungover for this shit...
I just got St Patricks day and the day after St Patricks day off, wich I'm pretty sure is as close to a raise as I'll ever get.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's a potato with a bite taken out of it in the kitchen
I woke up in the bathtub with money shoved down my pants. I must've done something right.
I saw his new girlfriend. She was flashing people, short and kinda chubby. I was happy with my life after that.
I'm just going to use my debit card. I feel bad buying pizza with the money I stole from my roommate...so I'm going to put it in my piggy bank.
I need to stop using "I went to the Harry Potter theme park" as my pickup line.
Shhh embrace your inner whore. Just embrace it.
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